Son's Heart

Suicide only happens when people are alone.

John Robin Murphy — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 14:58:26 +0000

I friend of mine committed suicide a couple of days ago. He must have come to the place of believing that this dark act was his best way out of his financial problems. The final lie he believed was that it made sense to implement a permanent solution to a temporary problem. He left behind a large family and literally hundreds of people who would have considered it a blessing to help him.
You might be able to understand how this could happen for someone whose life was a complete shambles and doesn’t have God in their life. My friend however, was one of the most involved and engaged Christian men on our community with many loving relationships. Your first thought might be to doubt the authenticity of His faith. God is clear that we do not know nor is it our place to judge the hearts of other people. If that is off limits then how are we to understand how this could happen.
We learn from the story of King David that when the Amalikites took everything and his men wanted to kill him that authentic Christians can experience despair. Instead of the despair being allowed to bring destruction in David’s life or dishonor to God the story reveals how David strengthened himself in God. From the psalms you can get a sense that the way he did this was to proclaim the truth of the awesome magnificence of God and to thank Him for how trustworthy He had been throughout His life, and the acceptance and belief in His promises, including David’s anointing to be king of Israel.
Once strengthened, David inquired of the Lord for guidance for how to deal with the situation. No longer in despair he turned to God for answers as to what to do. The result was that David regained all that was taken plus more and David became king of Israel very soon thereafter. In comparing the two situations of King David and my friend you can see that one reached out for strength before trying to figure out what to do and the other made a decision out of a heart full of isolation and hopelessness.
Jesus and God live in us through the presence of the Holy Spirit. We never need to be alone or in despair because God is one thought away and His promises are real. I have two Christian clients that admitted in just this last week that suicide had been on their mind. One told me that she overcame those thoughts by connecting with God every day by inviting Him into her thinking and proclaiming her trust in Him. The other who called me in a moment of wanting to kill himself from his deep despair about the condition of his life, admitted he had not even thought to engage God and rarely did so for any reason.
When we are in desperation we are in a place of fear. In this emotion from hell we are open to the lies of the enemy that are intended to kill, steal and destroy. God does not intend for you to take on these intense and powerful emotions on your own. When we do so we are in a pride-induced delusional state of self-sufficiency. I beg you to not fall for the plans of the enemy in any aspect of your life but instead to engage the author of life and victory in a conversation of strength and clarity in moments of despair and uncertainty. There is very real danger in doing otherwise. Remember He is one thought/prayer away.

Information or Transformation?

John Robin Murphy — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 14:54:22 +0000

In the pursuit of advancing their personal faith, most Christians engage in spiritual disciplines. Bible reading, devotionals, fasting, attending church, and quiet times are common. A not-so-common result is what God calls us to do in Romans 12:2; to be transformed not conformed to this world. This is because being informed is not being transformed.
Our Christian culture works very hard to be informed. But does all the information in itself satisfy the urge God built into us to become more Christ-like? God’s objective for our pursuit of faith is to mold each of us to inwardly reflect the character of His Son as described in Romans 8:29. Therefore our spiritual activities have a purpose defined by God. While reading the Bible is a blessing, the object of that endeavor should always include advancing the growth of Jesus’ character in you.
The law of the Spirit of Life in Romans 8:6 explains that we are to respond to the urgings of the Spirit in a way that gratifies the Spirit while putting to death the urges of the flesh. What better time to sense the urges of the Spirit than when we’re studying the Word, involved in worship or hearing a sermon? From God’s perspective, the “urge” from the Holy Spirit is His conviction; our gratifying “response” is repentance.
So the “formula” for spiritual growth is; Information + Conviction + Repentance = Transformation. We have helped many people advance through this process, commonly identifying forgiveness as a foundational characteristic of Christ that needs attention. The parable of the unmerciful servant “urges” us to forgive, and tells us that God will allow torment into our heart if we don’t. Until we respond to that Kingdom principle, we will not advance in our spiritual development.
It works like this: as people authentically open their minds to the Truth about forgiveness, they come under conviction that they have someone they need to forgive. The carnal nature resists forgiveness and tempts us with rationalizations to hang on to the bitterness that robs us of our joy and keeps us stalled in our relationship with God. Our act of repentance is a heartfelt apology to God for withholding forgiveness. This needs to be followed by forgiving the offender. In this transaction, we have died to the urging of the flesh and thus gratified the Spirit.
Now our heart has less unforgiveness and incrementally reflects more of the heart of Christ than before. The Lord responds by removing the torment and “rewiring” our heart to have greater peace and a deeper relationship with Him. Information was the beginning, but transformation resulted from repentance and forgiveness.
As you take part in the activities of your church or engage in spiritual disciplines, remember that participation is not the objective. The goal is transformation, which comes only after a response. So be listening for the Agent of Change. He speaks with conviction and provides the grace to respond.

God’s in Control?

John Robin Murphy — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 14:50:16 +0000

The phrase “God’s in control” as it is commonly used is not expressing the truth about God. I don’t disagree with the foundational truth. I do object to the false message conveyed by how people use it. The implication is that every behavior and outcome is under the direct control of God and that no matter what heartbreaking calamity may happen to us or those we know and love, it is God’s plan for that person to suffer. This phrase is most commonly used to comfort people. It is not true and it is not comforting.
A friend of mine committed suicide 4 days ago. I was not comforted by a mutual friend who confidently summed up the tragedy with, “God’s in control.” In a 911 memorial service Ruth Graham Lotts said that the onset of cancer and death of someone in her family was God’s plan for his life. People have told me repeatedly that the calamity they were suffering was a part of God’s plan. Several years ago I heard a speaker from Dallas Theological Seminary say that the Virginia Tech massacre was God’s plan, right down to the last gory detail.
I have no idea how a Christian can come to that conclusion. Even though this belief absolutely dishonors God it is something He can forgive. But the real problem is the depth of human suffering that this belief can cause. It is the basis of another line of false thinking: “Since God is in control, there is no point in my prayer or effort to change my life.” This presents us with an interesting conundrum expressed with the question, “If it is God’s will that I have a disease then does the pursuit of healing work against the will of God?”
The theologian Gregory A. Boyd in his books, God at War and The Problem with Evil, convincing proves that God is not responsible for the evil in this broken world and the evil acts of man. God tells us to resist and hate evil. Boyd also observes that as Christians, we are by definition in warfare against the enemy of God’s people. God does not in any way cause evil and never plans for us to suffer. God has established a kingdom that accommodates enough freewill for us to be in the position to choose evil or with His strengthening grace be obedient to Him. Without this freewill there would be no way for Christians to demonstrate our authentic love. God receives obedience as love. True obedience cannot exist outside of freewill.
God redeems evil in our lives by using it to mold us to progressively reflect inwardly who Christ is, Romans 8:28-29. The outcome of this molding is to share in the divine nature of Christ. A person whose life is spinning out of control because of their anger can no more legitimately blame God than they can blame their angry and abusive parents. We have to own the evil in our hearts and take it to God with humility and submission. When we suffer from events outside of our control, we are called to praise Him not for the affliction but in spite of it. His promise is to redeem every situation in this world, but we must bring it to Him, not blame Him for it or shirk our responsibility to address it.
Remember God has conveyed us into His Kingdom through our belief in His Son Jesus. In His Kingdom, evil can be redeemed to our benefit and to His glory. We are subject to the evil of this broken world and the consequences of the condition of our hearts. My God is the God who redeems the evil of this world, not the one who orchestrates it.

Empty Nest – The New Quiet

John Robin Murphy — Mon, 24 Oct 2011 14:44:35 +0000

The silence within is asking “what now?” After 21 years of close-contact parenting and some admitted hyper-diligence, the immediate needs of our children no longer need to be the first thought on our minds each morning.
The new stillness within our home made sense, but the stillness within me was an uncomfortable blend of vacancy, loneliness and uncertainty. A kind of empty uncertainty about purpose and a discomfort about how to “do life” from here. I could also feel two pulls. One feeling is a positive potential about the next season of life, while the other is a pull toward regret for mistakes made in the last season.
To whatever degree it is experienced, this stirring void at the core of our conscious world is one of the most intolerable feelings we can have. It is “dis-ease” that few people will tolerate long without a response. The response we choose can result in one of many possible life-changing outcomes ranging from the satisfaction of greater fulfillment to the heartache from trying a succession of empty, purposeless pursuits.
The answer to filling the void is to connect with the divine purposes built into us by God. Raising our children is clearly one of those purposes, and the only thing that can replace it is another divinely implanted purpose. At these moments when a season of life passes and the silence touches something empty inside, it is time to consult the Author of our divine purpose.
Try a prayer something like this when the new silence hits:
Dear God, thank you for the purpose you have built into me. Thank you for Your strengthening grace that enabled me to fulfill that calling during this last season. Now that day-to-day caring for my children is less of my life, I seek to understand your will for my life focus. Please show me and through Your grace give me the strength to embrace it. Protect me from the lies of the world which seek to drag me down the road of false empty purpose. I reject any trap to critically mull over the past, and I accept the truth of Your will for me to look forward, willing to respond to Your call for the next part of my life.
I pray these things in the name of your Son Jesus.

The Spirit of Life

John Robin Murphy — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 01:27:58 +0000

If Christians live under the law of the Spirit of Life why isn’t there more “life”? The deteriorating condition of the church is well documented from the perspective of declining membership and undifferentiated morality of Christians as compared to the secular world. How is it possible that Christians can be immersed in the Truth of the Gospel, but still struggle to achieve transformation for themselves and in their ministries?

The answer lies in understanding the remarkable life changing journey of sanctification God has for us beyond salvation. Clearly, Christ freed believers from the law of sin and death, but Romans 8:2 also says Christians are now under the law of the Spirit of Life. Christians are required not to move in the ways of the flesh, but to work in cooperation with the Spirit to be molded into the image of Christ inwardly (Romans 8:5, 29). Remember, Jesus said to wash the inside of the vessel first. Salvation is the first step of sanctification, which is meant to direct the course of the Christian life (II Thessalonians 2:13). It is the path of wholeness and wellbeing and the opportunity to share in the divine nature.

No matter how much we try to be more Christ-like in our behavior, it’s a struggle against the condition of our untransformed heart. On the other hand, if a believer’s heart is transformed to increasingly reflect the heart of Christ, then being more Christ-like comes naturally. Actually, as someone’s heart is increasingly transformed, they can’t help but act more Christ-like! While people are obviously changed inwardly at salvation, it is the process of sanctification that brings ongoing change in our heart.

There are many characteristics of the heart of Christ. Consider forgiveness to illustrate the point. Extending forgiveness toward others is a fundamental requirement of God. When we comply, we have a heart that is more like the heart of Christ. If we refuse to comply however, we are promised the suffering of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18:35. He was turned over by the King to be tortured for his unforgiveness. Jesus concludes this parable by saying that God will bring torment to those who refuse to forgive.

Whenever we suffer torment for opposing God’s will, we have two choices. One is the path to freedom; the other takes us into bondage which only adds to our suffering. We can give in to the urging of the flesh and embrace worldly distractions like food or drugs to medicate our heart angst, or we can go before God on our knees and repent of our unforgiveness. When we repent, we are calling upon God in faith to remove the source of our torment forever. If we choose to temporarily, intermittently crowd out our pain with the world’s solutions, we enter into bondage to an idol. Once in bondage, we add loss of control of our behavior to our suffering.
My personal breakthrough from overeating and other medicating behaviors began when I forgave the abusers of my youth and turned a heart of ministry toward them. After I did so, I began to notice God progressively remove tormenting bitterness from my heart. From that point, I was increasingly able to manage everyday temptation instead of giving in to my emotionally driven lust for food. Later I also repented of having food as an idol, which gave me more relief. After forgiveness and repentance, anyone’s heart will more resemble the heart of Christ. This obedience brings glory to God and greater peace and joy to our life.

In ministering heart transformation, we need to help people understand how they are opposing God’s desire for them to have the heart of Christ and lead them to comply.
This method of heart transformation has been successful in churches and ministries, including a maximum security prison, women’s and men’s prisoner reentry programs, and discipleship and drug addiction programs.

The call to have a transformed heart is for all who reside in the Kingdom of God. Romans 8 uses words like “obligation”, “debt”, and “requirement” to describe the importance God places on His desire to mold all of His children to reflect His Son’s image inwardly (the heart). The “call” isn’t an option for those who share God’s desire to have a life of peace, joy and wellbeing. Our ultimate hope and blessing is described in II Peter 1:4: “becoming sharers of the divine nature.” Is there any aspect of a person’s life that wouldn’t be improved by progressively sharing in the nature of Christ?

For our heart to more reflect the heart of Christ it must reflect less of the characteristics of the world. It must be less dominated by the flesh. The person we are today must make way for the heart of Christ. Withholding forgiveness is an example of a flesh urging encouraged by the world. To forgive like Christ forgave requires dying to that urge and allowing the Light of Christ to invade that part of your heart. The Holy Spirit who leads us in this process of transformation is planning a funeral for the person we are today. He knows that for us to truly be free we must first obey, and to truly live we must first die.

Mid – Life Purpose

John Robin Murphy — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 16:46:28 +0000

“Mid-life crisis” is really about the lack of “Mid-life purpose.” We experience it as a growing concern that something is off, that our energy for life is fading along with an increasing awareness of our mortality. In response, we tend to examine the condition of our life made up of activities, accomplishments, possessions and relationships and we’re left wondering what’s missing.

From there it is easy to be drawn into the seemingly logical thought that if some “thing” is missing then we must need a new thing or a lot more of an old thing. So we convince ourselves that all will be well when we get __X__. Fill in the blank with: new job, new spouse, new car, new house, new clothes, or maybe a new hobby. Warning! Warning! The world has a grip on your “thinker!”

The real answer was discovered long ago by the wisest man who ever lived – Solomon. God gave him wisdom, and because he didn’t ask for wealth God also gave Solomon untold riches. No- the answer is not wisdom or riches.

Despite Solomon’s devoted relationship with God, he drifted away. He used his wealth to partake of every worldly pleasure he could imagine. Solomon concluded that everything he experienced in ruling God’s people that was apart from God was vanity. Vanity is defined as emptiness, falsity, and futility (Amplified Bible).

Solomon’s testimony began with pleasing God, and then fell into progressive withdrawal. He then looked for the answer to his emptiness in the ways and pleasures of the world and ultimately turned back to God. “Painful” is the word Solomon used repeatedly to describe the condition of his heart in the midst of having access to unlimited self indulgences, power and success.

Solomon’s conclusion from all that he experienced was:
“He also has planted eternity in men’s hearts and minds [a divinely implanted sense of a purpose working through the ages which nothing under the sun but God alone can satisfy]…” Ecclesiastes 3:11, Amplified Bible

God and His purpose through us is the only “thing” that will satisfy the deep longing for purpose that He built into us. Turning back is as simple as engaging in an authentic prayer of repentance and allowing God back into the driver’s seat. I recommend the prayer below to all my clients. I am also in a season of praying this or some version of it almost every morning. I can promise you that God will honor this request. Pray this as often as you feel led:

Heavenly Father, I am sensing a distance from you and your eternal purpose for my life. Forgive me for crowding you out of my life and acting as if you don’t dwell within me through your Holy Spirit. Lord, I invite you to invade my thinking. I want to live this day as if you are in the room with me. I want to be aware of your presence, your love, and your care for me. I know that if I am living out my desire to please you, I will experience the eternal purpose you want for me. Please relieve me of the pain I have suffered from being apart from your purpose. I pray this in the name of your Son Jesus.

Amen

God’s Uncommon Vision for You

John Robin Murphy — Tue, 02 Jun 2009 20:53:23 +0000

God expresses His vision for all of His people in Romans 8:29: to be molded inwardly so as to reflect the image of Christ — to be like His Son and share in His divine nature. How totally amazing!!
It is an uncommon vision because it comes from the Creator of the universe, who wants you to be like his Son, the perfect representation of God Himself.

It is uncommon in that there is no supreme vision – none that could possibly trump it. It is the highest possible calling for mankind. It is also the highest calling for any entity laboring to advance His kingdom.

It is uncommon because it differs from the vision of the Church, which is more focused on training oneself to force Christ-like behavior rather than having His heart, which is the only way to authentically change.

You might disagree that the Church does not share God’s vision. Have you ever witnessed a person who claims to live by a set of beliefs and values but proves otherwise by his lifestyle? Ever been involved with an organization that had a great vision but clearly failed to follow or achieve it?

Our churches appear to have the vision of transformation but they try to achieve it using behavior modification tactics. This has brought us to a place where the behavior of born-again believers is no different than that of the secular world they are trying to save.

To share in God’s work we must share in His vision and His strategy. His strategy is to mold us, and His tool for this project is leading us to repent of anything in our hearts that does not reflect the heart of Christ. Christ’s heart is characterized by forgiveness, humility, loving God more than anything, truth, complete trust in the Father and more. As we progressively reflect these characteristics, we become more like Christ. After this happens, the fruit (our behavior) will come.

To yield apples you must plant apple tree seeds. From the dust of the earth comes a tree with the natural character to yield the fruit. We can hang apples on any tree, but no one is fooled, especially not the world Christianity wants to save. Our offerings are commonly deemed suspect by a world that is ready and willing to condemn our advances. The sustained life change we want and an effective body of Christ the world needs will come from adopting God’s uncommon vision as our own.

Simon says, “No!”

John Robin Murphy — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 18:42:21 +0000

Simon of Acts Chapter 8 vividly reflects the flesh driven desire to be fixed at no cost and to be disobedient at any cost. Instead of responding in obedience to God, we are tempted to default to pleading with our fellow Christian to pray off the consequences of our behavior. In response, driven by the desire ranging between compassion and wanting a fix for the sufferer we usually comply. How many times have you been asked to pray for someone with a failing marriage or a self destructive behavior when you knew there was clearly something that person needed to deal with God about? Ditto for Simon the magician. Peter was silent to his plea and rightly so.

Fresh to Christianity, Simon the renowned magician tried to buy the right to administer the Holy Spirit. In this first recorded attempt to pioneer the concept of franchising, he crossed Peter and the will of God. Peter forcefully responded with a diagnosis of what was wrong in Simon’s heart and predicted it would lead him to destruction. This is where Simon’s heart angst began.
Peter then called for Simon to repent as the only way out of reaping the predicted destruction. He encouraged Simon by letting him know that God wanted Simon’s heart healed and pleaded with him to do the right thing. Simon responded by rejecting the opportunity for absolute healing through obedience. Instead he took the “low road” in begging Peter to pray off the consequences of his sinfully motivated heart. We can only conclude that Peter said “no”, because the next passage after Simon’s plea simply reports that Peter left town. Thus proving evidence of the ancient origins of tough love!

Amazing! Simon did not repent, and Peter did not pray off the consequences. Peter did implore him to do the right thing and reminded Simon that God loved him and wanted his heart healed of its evil intent. Repentance is the necessary process of having our heart transformed to reflect the image of God. To pray off the consequences would have gone against God’s will for Simon. When ministering, we need to pray for God to reveal the necessary repentance and mercy in the process. However, to pray off the God-allowed heart pain that results from disobedience is to attempt to pray off the very will of God. Probably better to leave town.

Discipleship on Steroids – Part I

John Robin Murphy — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 04:00:36 +0000

A number of years ago, I began ministering to substance abusers at a rescue mission. I will never forget the shock I felt when I learned that many of the men we had worked with in the seven-month program were either high or stoned by sundown of graduation day. The following weeks revealed how truly futile my ministry efforts had been. One by one, most of our group fell back into their old life. Yes, I would have done it to help just one. However, the absence of sustained life change in most of the men after months of caring investment brought on demoralizing self-doubt.

Determined to try harder, I committed to deliver the Truth of God’s Word with as much hope and energy as I could muster. A year later, however, found me defeated, with my head down on my desk, praying to God to show me what was missing. I quickly had a strong impression that played out in my mind like a conversation with God. It started with a question: “Why don’t you weigh 300 lbs. anymore or get drunk 3 nights a week like you used to?” After a moment of confusion, the answer came. God had rewired my heart so that it no longer drove me to eat beyond the need of my body or drink to excess. That brought to mind the scripture, Romans 12:2, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind…”

I understood! These men needed the same heart change God had worked in me. Instead, the hearts we checked into the program were virtually the same as the ones we checked out seven months later! Their old hearts took them back to their old lives.

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Discipleship on Steroids – Part II

John Robin Murphy — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 03:45:11 +0000

Without heart change there is no sustained life change. Everything else is behavior modification that is rarely sustained outside of the program. The men were confessing Christians when they entered the program. The new nature that each had received upon their conversion was presumably in place. Over the next 7 months, they were immersed in worship, teaching, devotionals, church, preaching, book studies, 12-step groups and more. But were we transforming hearts? Our goal and the goal that energizes every ministry, donor and volunteer alike is the transformation of the most challenged people in our society into self sufficient, faith-filled Christians. However, fostering sustained life change is actually the most elusive outcome of ministry.

As I began to look for evidence of sustained life change in other ministries, I discovered that our results were typical even in church settings.

 Across faith-based and secular programs for addiction, incarceration, smoking, or any self-destructive behavior, the failure rate is typically between 75 to 95%

 Many prominent ministries, churches, and denominational leaders such as Prison Fellowship Ministry and Willow Creek Church strongly suspect or have research evidence to prove that they are not transforming hearts and achieving sustained life change the way they had hoped.

It is also evident from research that the truth of the Gospel as it is commonly presented does not guarantee that hearts are transformed, even for those who receive the new nature promised by God at conversion:

 Statistically, born-again believers have a moral failure rate equal to that of the secular world. Barna Group

 85% of young people between the ages of 16 and 29 believe that Christians are judgmental, hypocritical and un-Christ-like. Barna Group

 Willow Creek Church studied itself and it’s 350 affiliated churches and found that the correlation between church activities and the development of spiritual maturity was 0%! Willow Creek Church

The question we must wrestle with is: how it is possible that Christians can immerse themselves in the truth of the Gospel, but still struggle to transform themselves and apparently those to whom they minister?

The answer lies in understanding the difference between salvation and sanctification. It is clear that Christ freed believers from the law of sin and death, but the Word also says Christians are now under the law of the Spirit of life (Romans 8:2.) Christians are required not to move in the ways of the flesh, but to work in cooperation with the Spirit to be molded into the image of Christ outwardly and inwardly (Romans 8:4, 29.) The focus must be on the “inwardly.” Remember Jesus said to wash the inside of the vessel first.